I love this movie. I love this franchise. If you haven’t seen the movie yet, I tried to avoid spoiler quotes in this list, so I think you’ll be safe, but I can’t absolutely guarantee it. Check out the links at the end to see more posts I’ve written on Beetlejuice and a few other things.
Without further ado…
- “The living. The dead. Can they coexist? That’s what we’re here to find out.” – Lydia
- “Kills me to see you feeling like this. Because when you’re feeling like this it just makes me feel what you’re feeling. So in a weird way, it’s like, when you’re hurting, it’s hurting me. I don’t know.” – Rory
- “Your stupid stepmother. She’s got texting diarrhea.” – Rory
- “He flew halfway around the world to watch birds do it on the beach. And it killed him!” – Delia
- “When you’re all on your third kid and second divorce, we’ll see who gets the last laugh.” – Astrid
- “I’ve never hosted a funeral. I’ve never hosted anything without Charles standing there. Watching me. In awe.” – Delia
- “Forty years ago. But in my child body, that’s yesterday.” – Rory
- “I’ve lost my horny handyman.” – Delia
- “I am seeing a semi-multimedia visual manifesto of our loss.” – Delia
- “Well, you’re free to reject your inheritance when you’re living high off a tree-hugger’s salary.” – Delia
- “Long-distance relationships can be difficult. Especially when one of you is dead and the other’s ignoring you for 30 years.” – Beetlejuice
- “Sell him the honeymoon package. I’ll kill the new husband, and I’ll possess the ex-wife. I’ll make her do some unseemly things and then I’ll post the pics.” – Beetlejuice
- “Who knew it was a live grenade?” – Wolf
- “Never seen that chick before in my life. Or afterlife.” – Beetlejuice
- “You know, guys like you and me, we drive the gals crazy.” – Beetlejuice
- “Now she’s back, and she’s pissed.” – Beetlejuice
- “Death is so, like, ugh, it’s like, tragic, you know?” -Rory
- “I’m not falling for your New Age, overly emotional, trauma-bonding, yoga retreat bullshit.” – Astrid
- “The Lord’s sanctuary welcomes all who seek salvation and everlasting glory. Just not before noon, and between three and four.” – Father Damien
- “But I guess the only thing bungee jumping today is love.” – Rory
- “Back to the insanity.” – Astrid
- “This stapled sicko has her twisted heart set on a romantic reunion with Mr. Juice.” – Wolf
- “You’re not a cop. You’re an actor.” – Janet
- “I’m trying to capture the perfect primal scream.” – Delia
- “My water broke during Kill, Baby, Kill.” – Lydia
- “I thought a moose was about to attack me.” – Delia
- “Ever since I sold out and got famous, we have gotten closer.” – Lydia
- “He was turned on by you at the lowest point in your life.” – Delia
- “Where’s the obnoxious little goth girl who tormented me all those years ago?” – Delia
- “It looks like the kind of crappy book my mom would write.” – Astrid
- “I think I was in second grade when I went as Munch’s The Scream.” – Astrid
- “Yo, I’ve got fevers running all through me. All through me!” – Beetlejuice
- “He’s not a construct. He is literally a demon.” – Lydia
- “First of all, I want you two kids to know this is a safe space, okay?” – Beetlejuice
- “You’re just my unpacked trauma. You’re just my unpacked trauma.” – Rory
- “Leg man. Just like his old man.” – Beetlejuice
- “Hey, if stalking means trying to remarry the love of my life, well, I’m guilty as charged. Come here!” – Beetlejuice
- “Okay, see, that’s why schools need more art and less reading.” – Delia
- “What did that cheeseball do now?” – Delia
- “She doesn’t mean it. It’s just karma.” – Delia
- “My parents think I look more like Richie from Happy Days.” – Jeremy
- “For someone who is dying of radiation poisoning, you look beautiful.” – Jeremy
- “Because Rory loves to fun-suck everything. Even Halloween.” – Delia
- “The closest we ever got to Disney was when Astrid dressed as Cinderella’s dead mom.” – Lydia
- “Fruit salad. Isn’t that genius? It’s healthy and non-triggering.” – Jane
- “I thought if I could sell the Murder House, it would be a feather in my cap.” – Jane
- “There is no expiry date on sorrow. Oh. Oh, that’s good.” – Delia
- “Kings of Commerce, Knights of Nasdaq, deem him worthy to enter the gates of your realm.” – Delia
- “Apples, carrot sticks, and some blonde raisins, because no one likes a big fat clown.” – Rory
- “The juice is loose.” – Beetlejuice
- “One-way ticket on the Soul Train.” – Beetlejuice
- “Hands on your head, Asswipe!” – Wolf
- “Scumbag goes by the name of Beetlejuice. And a female fleshbag.” – Wolf
- “Men, this is what you’ve been training your entire deaths for.” – Wolf
- “We’re like Bonnie and Clyde, you and me. Without the bullet holes.” – Beetlejuice
- “I swear, the Afterlife is so random.” – Astrid
- “Your shriveled lips will start flappin’, or I’ll crack your itty-bitty skull like a goddamn walnut.” – Wolf
- “Yes! I’m shitting my pants.” – Rory
- “I get it. Now that you’re dead, you want to hang out with me.” – Beetlejuice
- “I think it was Dostoevsky who said, ‘Later, fucker!’“ – Beetlejuice
- “This is just a couple of influencers. No one under 5 million followers, and I think we have a Netflix executive in there.” – Rory
- “Well, I’m really more nightmare material, but thanks.” – Beetlejuice
- “I hit the codependent lottery when I met you.” – Rory
- “You know, honey, I’ve been goin’ through a lotta changes lately. Kind of a mid-afterlife crisis, I guess.” – Beetlejuice
- “I’m sorry things didn’t work out between us, but the 600-year age gap was a little bit much for me.” – Lydia
- “Shoulda got married in Vegas.” – Beetlejuice
- “I’ve spent so much time talking to the dead. It’s time I started living.” – Lydia
There’s so much more to check out! Try one of these:
Beetlejuice is the most Gen X Movie Ever and Here’s Why
Gen Xer Tries ChatGPT For the First Time (Beetlejuice edition)
50 Popular Gen X Actors and Actresses of the 2020s
9 Movies of Today that Represent Gen X in Midlife
The King of the Hill Reboot Has a Generation Problem
“Reality Bites” Movie Review by Gen Xer Seeing It For the First Time